Trusting self

It’s interesting how a lack of self-trust shows up.

The unwillingness to make a decision. 

Procrastination.

Mistrust of offers to help.

Gathering copious information, and poring over endless detail, in the hope that it will remove the risk or make whatever it is more clear-cut. 

And it’s all related to ego and our risk profile.

It’s ego that keeps us playing small (although it thinks it’s keeping us safe). 

It’s ego that prevents us taking a risk and playing the bigger game we were destined to play.

Ego feeds our insecurity, throwing up seemingly valid reason after valid reason for why we shouldn’t make this decision, or take that risk.

Ego keeps feeding us the “what ifs….”, creating insecurity and making us second-guess our every move. 

What if this doesn’t work? 

What if I don’t earn enough money? 

What if this person turns out like the last one?

What if I’m not enough?

What if I fail?

In the end, we can’t help but dither. 

But our risk profile also plays a part.

We know that people who prefer to work more collaboratively and have a strong need for structure tend to be more risk averse.

We also know that people who need a high degree of autonomy and play comfortably in ambiguous situations will have a much higher tolerance to risk.

But when that need for autonomy is paired with a need for structure and precision, it invariably creates procrastination: a need to get a result competing with a need to get it right.

So, most of us take the safe option of doing nothing…nothing that will take us out of our comfort zone; nothing that causes us to engage in confrontation.

It’s just easier to keep doing what we were doing – even though it’s hurting us, making us sick, or draining our energy – even though it gets us nowhere new.

To play a bigger game – to live up to all that you were born to be – you have to recognize, and let go of, ego.

How do you do that?

You replace it with intuition.

Intuition breeds confidence.

Intuition does not require thought.

Intuition is not in the head – it’s felt in the body.

You completely “know” when something is right, a good choice, the correct path…you just know!

It feels right.  There’s a calmness that settles on you when you choose to act from intuition – like a sigh; a settling; a relaxation.

You don’t need to check with your partner.  You don’t need to think it over.  You don’t need to see it in writing.  You just know.

The thing is, intuition takes courage. 

Do you have the courage to trust yourself – back yourself? 

Or will you allow ego to keep you fearful and stuck – playing the small league and making excuses for why you can’t change things? 

There’s always a choice.